Justify…

Why do I feel the need to justify? Is my justifying justified? Or am I proving or defending something? Am I retaliating in hopes of coming up on top? Do I want to be right or have the last word or possibly throw in a jab of sarcasm? And in that moment of feeling the need to justify, is silence an option? Doesn’t seem to be for me, but it was for Jesus.

It’s interesting how quickly I find myself responding, many times, okay most times, without any thought. In fact, isn’t it noteworthy how we tend to, in a way, esteem those who are quick to respond with a witty, sarcastic or even sneering comment. Is there a part of us that enjoys hearing someone be “put in their place?” Watch any TV show, from a kids show to a political debate, and the more character slashing, one-upmanship, and sarcasm that is dished out, the more clever the person or program.

So the Lord has brought to the surface this need to justify. As I was praying about it, He called two scriptures to mind. The first, Matthew 27:12-13 recounts: “And while He was being accused by the chief priests and elders, He answered nothing. Then Pilate said to Him, ‘Do You not hear how many things they testify against You?’ But He answered him not one word, so that the governor marveled greatly.” Why didn’t Jesus say anything? No doubt, He had every right to say something. And although we know that the events following His encounter with Pilate needed to occur to fulfill God’s plan of redemption, Jesus could have said something, anything, but He chose silence.

It’s hard to understand why Jesus was silent at times and yet at other times He met his skeptics and accusers with a response. My response seems to be more in the reactionary column – someone says something and I am quick to fire back. In the second scripture, Matthew 12:10-12, the Pharisees come to Jesus with this: “Looking for a reason to bring charges against Jesus, they asked him, “Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?” He said to them, “If any of you has a sheep and it falls into a pit on the Sabbath, will you not take hold of it and lift it out? How much more valuable is a person than a sheep! Therefore it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath.” Justification, delivered in truth and in love.

Jesus justified in truth and in love, a pure motive, driven by Truth and Love. Oh to be driven by Truth and Love…not by my emotions. Jesus was one with the Father so His response, words or silence, were not driven by emotions or sinful behavior. How do we follow that example? It seems so unattainable. Where is my pause or mute button before I respond? What if, in that split second, when I am focused on my comeback to the person that stands before me, I switch my gaze upward to the Father instead. Just a split second pause (and mute) to unite my heart with His. And there is no doubt that He will give me my response, be it His words spoken, or silence.

Psalm 86:11 “Conduct me, O Lord, in thy way, and I will walk in thy truth: let my heart rejoice that it may fear (revere) thy name” (Douay-Rheims version).